In my last “dating” article, I went over a few things related to dating:
- “The sampling” attitude
- The wrong definition of “like”
- That Christ can overcome the wanton desires of this world for dating
One of the most dangerous problems with the world’s method of boy/girl relationships is what I call the “sampling” attitude. A guy likes a girl, they become “an item” then they break up deciding they don’t really like each other. Then they go out and do it again with some relationships lasting only a few days!
This is a horrible mindset people, including Christians, have been sucked into. It is not OK, to test out relationships to see if they will work! It is not OK to sample multiple people to see if they are the “one”! It is not OK, to simply test out a girl (or a boy if you are a girl)!
Truly liking someone and pursuing a relationship is held deep in a beliefs very contradictory to what the world believes.
Instead of “sampling” someone, if a guy likes a girl, he should start by developing a friendship. This friendship should be focused without feelings towards one another. If, after a friendship has been made, the guy still likes the girl, he should try to develop more than a friendship with the girl.
Developing “more than a friendship” is where some feelings may come in. At this point, this guy should only be doing this if he strongly believes that he could marry this girl. In fact, some of the only things that should stop him from marrying her would be if God said “no”. Otherwise, this guy should be thinking that of this girl.
The next step is where it gets more serious. The guy should ask the girl’s father if he may date the girl. At this point, the guy should be sure that God has said “yes” to this relationship. The guy should not pursue any further with this girl if he does not plan on marrying her. This step is where it can get complicated for many, but it is very vital to the stability of the relationship.
Some might say that the above is too hard. That the world’s way is much easier. Well, of course the world’s way is easier, and maybe less uncomfortable, but that doesn’t make it right. The Bible should be the guide for all our relationships, especially boy/girl ones.